Overheared on my way to Sarah's

"My nephew is a fireman, in fact he is doing a woman up the street right now."
--A woman said to her neighbour.

what are they doing over there?

"horizontal virgin"

--overeheard from the professor of the painting class right next to ours...something rather interesting is happening over there.









...alright I misheard and it was horizontal conversoin.

A choosing Begger

Before I begin, I have to write something to vouch for myself. When I pass by someone and they ask for money I will usually donate some, just because you never know, that may be the person that actually needs the money and you may be helping them out. Even if I have been fooled ninety nine times and then one person really needed it, well its worth it for me to help one out of 100 people.

That being said:
I was walking out of the dollar store today when a woman approached me. I had gone there for a teapot and so I had only brought change with me, had very little money on me. This woman shows me a peice of paper that wrote something along the lines of "i am a single mother please give me money so that I can feed my children." Luckily, as she forced me to read this, all of my valuables were in my front pocket, so I knew no children were comming up behind me to pick pocket me. I gave her ...1.35. It's always the reactions that people give me afterwards that makes me certain if they are genuine or not. She began to beg me for five dollar bills, to which I told her I had only change on me because I went to the dollar store. She tried still to convince me that she deserved five dollars to feed her family. Eventually she gave up or realized I was telling the truth and walked away.

If she really did have children, they would have pickpocketed me.

a dog

I met a lovely dog yesterday as I was out in the woods writing.
It was a weiner dog, he could apparently read. He must have liked my story because after the on visit with me his owner took him away, but he ran back and ran straight to me. I must be a good writer for dogs.

Things you did not need to know

"Somebody should definately make a poccohauntus porno."
~Some guy in the A wing.

"I have yet to fully have butt sex."
~A guy that works at the front desk of my buildling, I passed by him when he said this to a girl who also works here (they were not working at the time) I must try to avoid them now.

The woman who was busy on her phone

There was a woman today in front of us at checkout, she was on her phone as she unloaded her cart. It was a business call, so she apparently could not wait until she was at home or driving her car. Because one of her hands was pushing this phone against her face the other one had to empty out the cart one item at a time. She also left the cart at the end of the conveyer belt. So she would pick an item up, walk down the moving conveyer belt to put it down with the other items. I was able to unload my groceries before she even finished.

The cashier who has to pee.

Sarah was about to go into a line up that was moving a lot faster than the one I was standing in. Then the cashier put a sign up saying that she would not take anyone. When Sarah joined me we watched the other line up and discovered the reason for that cashier’s productivity. She was jumping up and down and quickly swiping everything. She seemed to be closing her cash to go to the bathroom, but what a trooper for taking two extra shoppers before her break.